A Few Tips On Traveling the Upper Pearl Safely

Thou Shall Not Drive Smack in the Middle of the Channel

1) Boat rules are kind of like cars, stay to the right on the river, pass on the left only when it's safe and you have a clear view of what's coming at you.

Thou Shall Not Think Thy Boat is Faster Than Others

2) When in doubt, slow down and let the other guy pass safely.  Better to cuss him out and live to ride another day.  This applies when you come up on some skiers/wakeboarder's/tubes...   Look around, if you can't pass safely... simply slow down...  If you don't know what to do, simply stop.   It ain't worth hurting somebody to gain a few seconds......

Thou Shall Not Be an Idiot

3)This one is straight forward for those who don't know.... wind, sun, sand & water sap a lot out of you, more than you know (about 2 to 1 versus land).  As a former water ski instructor, I know,  it makes a big difference.  If ya gonna drink, find someone to drive.  Boating & drinking is twice as bad as a car & the results are twice as bad.

I ain't naive, if you drink & gonna drive, idle the son of bitch down the river.  Enjoy the view, point out the local flora and fauna, remark how well Eddie has improved the Island, stop at Survivor Island and visit with Kim.  Remark how well you're  navigating the 180 degree turn above Ratliff.  The goal here is everybody get's home safe.  Better to be slow than an idiot that hurts someone.  Once you get to land, call someone (preferably sober) and catch a ride.  Taxi's will come to Ratliff & Tommy's. Let's set a goal that nobody get's hurt or dies on the upper Pearl.  Besides, a BUI or DUI sucks.

Thou Shall Be Responsible for Thy Wake

4) "No Wake Zone"  Comin outta Tommy's, Ratliff Ferry, right below Survivor Island to right above Eddies Island,  from Bitch Island to past Flag Island are all NO WAKE ZONES.  <Don't know where this is @, see map>Plenty of Po Po who will write u tickets for violating this rule.  And if u want 2 know,  tickets start @ $150....  Depending on how much u piss off the po po.....

Thou Shall Make Sure Everyone Can Float

5) Make sure you have enough PFD's (life vest) for everyone in the boat (i.e. one of those ugly square things from WalMart for everybody on the boat).   If you have anyone under 13 years old on the boat, they must be wearing the PFD at all times, period.

Thou Shall Make Sure "The Drunk Guy in the Water" Survives

6) Have a "throwable" on the boat if it is over 16' feet.  Generally, this is a square boat cushion.  Get one at Walmart for a few bucks.

Thou Shall Respect the Law

7) Respect the Law Enforcement Officers. These guys are trying to make sure we don't kill ourselves.  Don't act the fool, pretend you know the law or think your above it.  Follow their instruction and treat them with respect.  They keep the River safe.

These are a few simple Rules to Follow and we will all have a good time!

For a List of Official Rules see: